I tried to catch the tail end of the Cherry Blossom festival today, but I missed all the flowers but a small patch away from the water. I was taking pictures of them when three women in their fifties asked me to take their picture. When I handed Woman 1’s phone back, she said:

WOMAN 1: Thank you, sir. Now, are you an expert on cherries?

ME: No, I don’t believe I am.

WOMAN 1:  I thought maybe these were a special kind of cherry tree that doesn’t have any cherries. Are they a special kind of cherry tree that doesn’t have cherries?

ME: I—

WOMAN 1: Have you been to the tidal basin? Are there cherries?

ME: N—

WOMAN 2: Where are my cherries!

WOMAN 1: He says these are special cherry trees that don’t have cherries.

WOMAN 2: Is he an expert on cherries?

ME: I live here, and I’ve never seen cherries.

WOMAN 2: It’s cold!

ME: You should have been here last week. I thought I didn’t have to wear socks anymore.

WOMAN 1: We’ve been here four days.

WOMAN 2: It’s too damned cold!

WOMAN 3: Nice to meet you!